Today I was thinking about happiness and feeling good. While working on our new book I came across a page where we wrote “We are meant to be happy” and it really stood out for me today. It is so true but I don’t think anyone wants to admit it. This is a controversial thing to say and I never want to tell people how they are supposed to feel. Instead, I am inviting you to think about this quote and what it means.
So, I will start with why we put it in our book, “Things To Know About Self-Love”. We often beat ourselves down and find reasons to allow ourselves not to be happy.
“You shouldn’t be happy, you don’t have enough money”
“You shouldn’t be happy, you’re fat”
“You can’t be happy, your single”.
I’m calling bullshit to all of those examples and any other self-deprecating reason you feel that you aren’t permitted to enjoy your life.
I want you to understand something as you read this. It is ok to feel the feelings that you have. It is ok to be angry, or sad, or disappointed. We are human. I do not want you to suppress yourself or just ignore your emotions. What I want to tackle today is the notion that one does not deserve happiness.
Joy isn’t a destination and it is not something that has to be earned. We already have everything we need to be happy. You are supposed to feel good. You are supposed to take joy in the things you like. If something makes you happy, you don’t need anyone’s approval to feel good. Just because you do not fit a societal norm of what is supposed to mean happiness doesn’t mean you don’t deserve it. An example may be people with kids vs people without. A person who chooses to not have children may be just as happy as someone who does.
You have the power to bring joy into your life and find joy in the life you already have. I challenge you to look at your life and write down everything that you love about it. Maybe just start off writing everything that you loved about the day.
“I love my car because it is mine and I paid for it. It isn’t new and it isn’t fancy but it makes me happy.”
“I am happy drinking my cup of tea.”
“I am happy when I hang out with my friends.”
Look for what makes you happy and really absorb yourself in that feeling.
“I am happy that the sun is out today. I am happy that even though it is super hot outside, my flowers are blooming.”
At the end of the day, you can find ways to upset yourself and focus on a lack mindset. OR you can focus on all of the good things you do have. If you are reading this, you have some sort of smart device and internet access. This is a lot more than other people possess. So, be effing thankful and happy and allow yourself to feel good. We are supposed to be happy. We are allowed to be happy, even if things aren’t perfect. Life is a work in progress. You are a work in progress. If you wait until society tells you it’s ok now to smile, keep on waiting. If you wait until you are “perfect” or your life is today’s version of the ideal you may never be happy. You already have what you need to be joyful. You are already the perfect you. You can be happy on your life journey. Don’t wait until you get to this supposed destination.
If you are interested in more self-love inspiration to check out our book “Things To Know About Self Love”. You can find more information about it here.
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